Imposter Syndrome Is Lying to You — Science Proves You're Already a Great Leader
Three out of four executive women admit they've battled imposter syndrome at some point in their careers. Over half admitted to feeling afraid they wouldn’t live up to others’ expectations or that people wouldn’t believe they were capable enough. The feelings of isolation don’t help — 54% of executive women agree that the higher you climb the ladder, the lonelier it gets. Women are simply too few and far between at the top.
And there’s a reason for that — but it’s not because you’re not good enough.
We often blame ourselves for self-doubt and a lack of confidence. But understanding how biological differences and neuroplasticity play into confidence can help remove that sense of guilt.
Why Confidence Matters
Human beings are wired to respond to confidence. From an evolutionary standpoint, leadership evolved as a survival mechanism. Traits like decisiveness, fairness, and confidence were naturally selected because they enhanced group cohesion and increased the chances of survival.
But the biological underpinnings of confidence differ between men and women.
The Testosterone Factor
Testosterone — which occurs at levels seven to eight times higher in men than in women — drives more risk-taking behavior and quicker decision-making. Research even shows that testosterone influences preferences in product choices. For example, men with higher prenatal testosterone exposure are more likely to prefer stereotypically masculine colors like blue and gray over bright, vibrant shades.
Notice a pattern? Most corporate boardrooms reflect this same muted color scheme — because the environments we work in were designed by and for men. So when you’re already feeling singled out, the environment only subconsciously amplifies that isolation. You don’t see yourself in that room, down to the choice of carpet tile.
Men also tend to make decisions based on rules, regulations, and immediate context. This allows for fast, decisive action based on a clear set of guidelines.
A Different Style of Decision-Making
But decisions aren’t always black and white. Ethical decision-making, in particular, is influenced by a complex mix of personal values, organizational culture, societal norms, and contextual factors.
Research shows that female leaders are more inclined to consider these broader factors. Women are more likely to take a collaborative approach, weigh the interests of multiple stakeholders, and evaluate more possible solutions before making a decision. Women’s decision-making tends to be more complex, thoughtful, and inclusive — different, but not less effective.
The Strength of Balanced Decision-Making
It’s not that one style of decision-making is better than the other — they’re complementary. Quick, rule-based decisions can be essential in high-stakes situations. But thoughtful, collaborative decision-making ensures that complex problems are solved with fairness and long-term success in mind.
The problem is that the system has elevated fast, risk-taking decision-making as the gold standard of leadership — and undervalued the strengths women naturally bring to the table.
Successful leadership often requires a balance of both — decisiveness when the moment demands it and thoughtfulness when the solution requires more nuance. Women’s natural ability to integrate multiple perspectives and weigh long-term consequences is a leadership strength, not a weakness.
But because that’s not how leadership has traditionally looked, women are told they’re doing it wrong.
Perception vs. Reality
A Pew Center study found that the public views women as equal to or better than men in five of seven key leadership traits:
Smarter
More honest
More organizedhd
Equally innovative
The only traits where men were seen as stronger? Decisiveness and ambition. And that’s the story we’ve all been told: that good leadership = decisiveness + ambition.
Women seen as more compassionate, men as more decisive (% saying each characteristic is ...)
If women are recognized as highly capable leaders, why do so many still suffer from imposter syndrome? Because we’re measuring ourselves against a leadership playbook we didn’t write.
The answer lies in the constant stream of microaggressions women face:
Having your judgment questioned
Being mistaken for someone more junior
Being interrupted or spoken over
These small but repeated signals undermine confidence over time. And when women are underrepresented at every stage of the corporate pipeline, and more and more so the higher up you go, the more these messages overwhelm and subdue your inner voice and confidence.
The Stress Loop: How Negative Messaging Reinforces Stress
Another issue is the stress loop — we covered this in more detail in this previous post. Acute stress can sometimes sharpen your focus and improve decision-making. But chronic stress, like the kind caused by repeated microaggressions or feeling like an imposter, wears down your cognitive function over time and inhibits creative thinking.
Your Reticular Activating System (RAS) acts like a mental filter, reinforcing this cycle. If you’ve repeatedly received the message that you’re less competent or capable, your RAS will filter for evidence that confirms that belief — even when it’s not true. This mental filter strengthens negative thought patterns, which amplifies stress and undermines your confidence. The good news? You can retrain your RAS by challenging those conditioned beliefs and intentionally shifting your focus toward your strengths.
Feeling like you're faking it? You’re not.
Let’s be clear: You are NOT bad at decision-making. You are highly skilled at weighing complex factors, evaluating relative risks, considering others, and finding balanced solutions.
But human psychology is wired to believe the loudest, most confident voice — and for centuries, that voice has belonged to men.
You DO know what you’re talking about. You are a good decision-maker.
What Leadership Science Says
An entire body of leadership science backs you up. Effective leaders balance assertiveness (linked to testosterone) with stress regulation (lower cortisol). The brain regions involved in decision-making (the prefrontal cortex) and emotional regulation (the amygdala) are both more active in successful leaders — meaning effective leadership requires both strategic thinking and social understanding.
How to Build Confidence Within the System
If you know you’re a strong decision-maker but feel your confidence is being undermined by external factors, you can strengthen your position without changing who you are.
1. Leverage Your Collaborative Approach to Build Influence
Use your natural ability to weigh different perspectives to build alliances across teams. Influence doesn’t always come from authority — it comes from being known as a trusted, thoughtful decision-maker.
2. Reclaim Credit for Your Work
If someone repeats or takes credit for your idea in a meeting, speak up:
"Thanks for reinforcing the idea I shared earlier. Let’s explore how we can implement it."
Confidence isn’t about volume — it’s about clarity and ownership.
3. Develop a Decision-Making Framework
Create a personal strategy to improve decision-making speed without sacrificing quality. For example:
Step 1: Identify the core problem.
Step 2: Evaluate the impact on key stakeholders.
Step 3: Weigh the long-term consequences.
Step 4: Act decisively — even if you don’t have every detail.
4. Stop Apologizing for Thoughtful Decisions
Fast decisions aren’t always good decisions. If you need time to weigh different factors, say so confidently:
"I’m considering the long-term impact before deciding — I’ll follow up shortly."
And then do.
The Bottom Line
You’re not failing — the system is biased.
The traits that make you a strong leader are often overlooked because they don’t fit outdated, male-centric models of leadership. But thoughtful, collaborative, and strategic decision-making is just as valuable — if not more so — than quick, high-risk choices.
The problem isn’t that you don’t belong.
The problem is that the system wasn’t built for you.
It’s time to stop second-guessing yourself
If you’re tired of feeling like you don’t belong despite the evidence that you’re a capable, effective leader — it’s time to take action.
➡️ Book a 1:1 coaching session to uncover the patterns holding you back and start building confidence grounded in your unique strengths.
➡️ Explore the connection between biology, stress, and leadership — and learn how to work with your brain, not against it.
